Potty Training…oh the joys
Nobody Said Parenting Was Going o Be Easy.
One of the absolute wonders/joys/frustrations/mind-boggling experiences/pride inducing parts of parenting is POTTY TRAINING.
I’ll let you in on a little secret…everyone thinks they are doing it right…and everyone has an opinion.
There are even self-proclaimed “experts” out there that say they have it all figured out and their way is the best/only way to potty train your kids.
Well….I’m calling bullshit on all that. Think about it. How many Kindergartners/10 year olds/teenagers/ADULTS do you know that don’t know how to use the toilet? We all figure it out….eventually.
The following is the best advice I can give when it comes to potty training (without sounding like one of those self-proclaimed “experts.”)
1) Don’t pressure your child to use the toilet.
Pressuring your little guy or girl to use the potty could end up backfiring on you in the long run. We don’t want to create a truly negative association with using the toilet. If we do, the consequences could be less than awesome. If we create negative associations with using the toilet we could trigger rebellion with our little ones in relation to going to the bathroom…knocking us back weeks or months. But, more importantly (in terms of their overall health) we don’t want to have them start withholding going to the bathroom. This could have serious health repercussions. Holding your urine for too long can weaken the bladder muscles over time. Holding your urine for extremely long periods of time can also cause urinary tract infections due to bacteria build-up. In addition, it can increase your risk of kidney disease.
The longer you wait to poop, the more water your body removes from the waste. Eventually, this can lead to constipation and impactions, which may require laxatives or even surgery to remove.
2) Keep encouraging them and don’t punish them.
Kids love verbal encouragement. They love praise. They are always trying to make you happy and proud of them (true fact, even when we feel like they are trying to do the opposite).
It’s important to give them positive reinforcement on their journey to being fully potty trained. Keep up the encouragement as well. Don’t just stop once you think the kids got it down. Keep it up. Give them high-fives and hugs. Give them fist bumps and head-butts.
DO NOT punish them if they have an accident. Adding an entirely new level of pressure from mom and dad will just add to the length of time it takes to get potty trained. Think about it. Little Jimmy is outside, playing, having the time of his life. He’s not thinking about having to pee….until it’s too late. By then, all bets are off. He has an accident. Instead of berating him in front of his little buddies, tell him it’s all “okay”. Don’t make this phase last. Because…after all, it is okay. They will get it.
3) Don’t force the issue.
Make sure your little sweetums is showing signs of being ready. Is he or she mimicking you or your wife going to the bathroom. Is he or she asking about going to the potty. Are they able to communicate their desires. If the answer to these questions is YES, then it might be time.
If they show no interest in using the potty, DON’T force them to sit down and “go.” That will just prolong the issue. It will create a negative feeling toward using the bathroom, and thus create an atmosphere of resistance to using the bathroom. Encouragement, not forcing the issue, is the best way to go.
4) Know there are going to accidents.
Unless your child is Kal El, there will most likely be accidents. These accidents happen most often when they are exhausted, or while they are sleeping (a piece of advice is to keep using the “pull-ups” at night until you are confident they can make it through the night). Accidents happen when they are too distracted to think about using the toilet. (a piece of advice is to create a routine. They go to the potty once every two hours no matter what. Give them a “heads up” that a Pee-Pee break is coming).
Don’t lose your mind if an accident happens. Odds are, you had an accident once or twice as well (…remember college??)
5) Use a chart.
We use a Mickey Mouse chart in our house. Every successful pee-pee or poo our son has, he gets a sticker. When he gets enough stickers he gets a “treat.” It is crazy how he remembers the fact that he deserves a sticker, even when we forget. It works!
This is a bewildering, exciting, humbling time.
But, just like with all phases, this one too shall pass.
Enjoy it while it lasts…because you will blink and your little darling will be asking for the car keys.